And I just have this feeling... We are not meant to be... I'm sick and tired of these stories I heard about you... I don't even believe if it's true... And I know... It's gonna hurt more if I continue to like you...When one day I found out...It's all just a lie... So I've decided... To let it go... If we are meant for each other... I guess time will determine it all... I won't be putting anymore efforts to get to know you better... Coz you're not even trying... I feel so rejected... To my friend who started our friendship... You're saying I'll regret if I throw all these feelings away? Tell me why should I? My day and nights are haunted with thoughts... And I hate all those thoughts... It's not that I'm a coward... It's not that I'm not ready... It's not that I'm still stuck in my terrible past with that heartbreaker... It's just that I won't force people to befriend me if they don't want to... And today... Will be the last day I shed my tears because I feel so desperate for a person to befriend me... I have better things in life to cry about... So I just found out that thinking negative is a sin...Better than I keep on thinking that he'll never accept me ever in his life...And all those negative thoughts... Isn't it better if I forget him? Though it feels impossible... Life has to move on...

P.S. I will never force you to be my friend...What more to love me... I've never ever have that thought... You can just tell me to get out of your life if you want to...I'll respect your decisions... Don't be like that ass who only act to love me all the while... It's hurts even more... Hmms... I guess I rather be alone... I'm just meant to be lonely... I'll just let time determine everything... And I know Allah will give me happiness some day... And only Allah knows how I really feel now...


Hmms... That heartbreaker has moved on and seems so happy with his gal...Me...I have moved on...But I'm sad about OTHER stuffs... Argh! This is SO not supposed to be happening! This is why I only want to befriend him later this year! Not EARLY this year! And my plan is all SPOILED! And my heart is partially broken! Damn it...-.-... He's not supposed to know... Why must he know now?? Haiz... I guess I can never be happy like that guy... How does he move on so easily...?? Hahas! Don't get wrong ideas uh! I have NO feelings for him anymore! He broke my heart n i healed it myself ok? So why should I still like him? Hahas! Yay! I'm smiling again! Hehe... I get happy again so easily... Oh maybe I should think positive... I'm being selfish if I think negative... Maybe he's just shy...And not couldn't be bothered... And maybe just now he left without replying my hello coz he really has to rush off! It feels good to think positive! Hehes... I know... Kirin... YOU ARE SOOOO WEIRD! LoL!

Eh 'O' Levels coming what... Maybe he doesn't want me to think too much about him and wants me to concentrate more on my studies! Yea! That's the way! Haha! And that's what I'll do... I'll ignore him too! Haha! Crazy girl... But to study mah... Damn! 2 more weeks Mock exam! I want study leh! Only started revision on A-maths! Ok la... I'm wasting my time crying n blogging! And I think I know perfectly well why i am SOOOOO EMOTIONAL and negative thinking this week... The time is coming! Hahas... I guess it'll be over soon... I hate this period of time... I'm such an emokid! I hate emokids! Hahas! Too bad I was one last year... Ugh... Makes me sick...XD
Emokids=Losers=Sinners coz they slit and hurt themselves[like what the fuck?]...And they ALWAYS tink negative thoughts! ALWAYS I TELL YOU! I've met someone like that before! One thing for sure these people are great at influencing you to be one of these emoarses... Don't be an EMOKID!!! Haha!