Yeehawww~! Tomorrow is the start of the fasting month!! I LOIKE! Haha! Mainly bacause, during this month, I am able to 'clean' myself... As in, I'm not allowed to say all those vulgarities, think nonsense stuffs and yada yadas... ESPECIALLY to control my anger! Only one part which is kinda tough for me... I can't look in the mirror too long... Alaa...! Haha!

Didn't do much today... Slept late again last night... Hahas! Slept after editing my blogskin... I must always change my blogskin! Haha! Next change will be on Hari Raya... Then Graduation Night...All these big events la... Hahas! Can you believe it?? I cried coz I was so happy last night!? For the FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE! haha! And he was the only one who could make me cry tears of joy... Hehes... I don't know whether he read my blog last night or what uh... But he said some super sweet stuffs that I don't expect from him yesterday! I laughed and laughed and cried! Hahaha! What the hell... LoL! I am NOT sharing with you what he told me! Hehe! Anyways, there's a high chance I'm joining Tampines Idol next year... And Singapore Idol if I manage to win the title of Tampines Idol... Hahas! If not, I won't join! Haha! With God's willing, I might join Tampines Idol la... Hahas! Hmm...I wonder if I'll get paid for that TCCC singing thingy after my 'O' Levels.., I don't think so la... But if I will get paid... Isn't it cool? I'll officially be a singer! Wheee~! Haha!

Watched Meet The Robinsons just now... I cried upon watching the ending as they played Little Wonders... *Sobx*! It's ending too early!! I miss my 4E3 and teachers already!! Haiz... Seriously I got emotional there... Haha! I wanted to sing along, but I was too sad to even sing! Haha! Then went to my grandma's house again... Played Audition with Nadhirah... Alot of screamings going on there... Haha! Super stressful game! So we screamed everytime we screwed up! Haha! I hate that game...-.-... LoL! Then went home, mum bought me Vienetta... OH MY GOSH! Thank you mumzies! Hahas! I've always wanted that! Haha! And she said that she'd spent anything for me! Haha! Awww...so sweet of you... LoL! Though we quarrelled in the cab, on the way to my granny's house... Haha! Lame shit... Now we're ok... Nobody can stay angry with me for long after I joke with them! Haha! They just HAVE TO laugh...LoL! Well at least for some... Haha! Ok la! Laptop battery running low! Gotta go now! Oh yea! I've added Junyuan's 'David Cook' at friendster! Haha! Ok I know I'm lame... LoL!

Yo yo! Wassup??! So as promised, I'll continue yesterday's post...

Urmm...Where was I? Oh I was thanking everyone! Hahas! I mentioned about me, being a singer right? Isn't it cool? I told my grandmother just now and she was indeeed excited to hear me sing in public! I'm excited for that too! Hahas! And I hope my supporters will come and support me some days! Can I even perform yesterday without your supports? Of coz not! How can I forget to thank you peepz?! Gosh...I'm SO sorry! To my dearest 4E3 and Junyuanites... Without your supports, I wouldn't have that confidence to perform well yesterday! And to my bestfriend, Maizurah, thank you for taking the video for me, even though the video is blur and give me headache if I watch it! Hahaha! Just kidding la! And Steph, thanks for lending me your hair spray! And Hui Peng, thanks for taking a lot of pictures for me! Diyana, thanks for the 24/7 support since like...FOREVER... Haha! And thanks for spreading the words about my voice... =)

To my teachers of Junyuan Secondary... Thanks for making my 4 years in this school worth-while and meaningful... And I'm really honoured to entertain you guys for the last time yesterday... And I'm really glad that you loved it! Hehes! Especially Mr Ang K S... I'm happy that I was able to make you smile... And Mr Tang, I really wanna thank you for the rose you gave me! You're so sweet la cher! Even though you never taught me before... Haha! And I'm so proud that I made my Principal smile upon hearing me sing! Hehe! Mdm Fauziah and Miss Zaleha, thanks for giving me the chance to showcase my talent to the school! To Mr Ang K K... I remembered you told me to sing in class last year when you asked me to introduce myself to the class and I said I like to sing... But I didn't want to... Hahas! So that performance was for you as well! And you said you'll invite me to the old folks' home to sing for you when you're old right? Hahas! Don't worry Mr Ang, you don't have to wait that long...I'll sing for you anytime you want me to ok? Just tell me when! Hehe! And I don't think you deserve to be in the old folks' home anyway... To cikgu Irni, I'm very thankful to have you as my Malay teacher since, because of you, I was able to get that A1 for my 'O' Levels... And last but not least, Mdm Fara and Mdm Irma, without you guys, I wouldn't get that A1 for my CCA either... I really appreciate it very much!! I sayang all of my teachers in Junyuan Secondary! =)

So let's talk about what happened yesterday... I was VERY nervous before I perform... Haha! But all those compliments and encouragements, simply flatters me and motivates me to carry on! Thanks peepz! I really appreciate it! Hehes! And there's one who even said I Love You to me... Hahas! Awww...So sweet... LoL! Sorry I didn't reply coz I was...errr...Stunned? Hahaha! And I simply don't know what I should reply... Love You too? Hahaha! Ermm that is not Kirin unfortunately... LoL! Most of the time I just laugh at these stuffs la... Hahas! I take it as a joke! Huahaha!

While the others before us perform... Me and Sam Chua were like...errr...Crazy? Haha! Simply because, I was mewing and she was clucking in the toilet. Haha! And we sang because of you in a terrible manner... Just to adjust our throat somehow... Haha! Then after we perform, we were so happy that we danced in the toilet! Haha! Lucky nobody came in! Haha! And I was SOO Hyper! Hehes! I felt like performing again! Forgetting that I WILL be performing again in a short while... Then after Ahmad sang, we all rushed to the stage, to sing Little wonders! I sang with full energy! Even Diyana agreed that I looked happy while singing that song! It's because I WAS HAPPY! Hahas! It's sad that I didn't get to take pictures with the teachers and that Mr Wee is leaving us... I wish him well...! =)

After the performance, I rushed to meet my teachers and distribute the presents [Santa Claus... Haha!] And the first teacher is... MR ANG K S! Hehe! I was like so worried that I couldn't find him at first! Hehe! And he loved my voice! Aww... I'm glad you did Mr Ang! Hehe! Then I saw Mrs Shankar... She hugged me... Awww... Hahas! For the first time? LoL! She was shocked that I could sing! And then I went to Teachers' Office... Then saw Mr Ang K K... He was surprised to hear me sing too! And he was so funny la yesterday! Hahas! Then saw Mr Khong, gave him present, and we joked with him! Hahas! Then met more teachers and I was rained with praises? Haha! And then I went to Mdm Irma's table, she hugged me and Maizurah... Aww... Hahas! And then I went to see Mdm Irni to give her present to her, then she was like..Why didn't you join Junyuan Idol [Maybe coz...Junyuan Idol doesn't exist? Junyuan Superstar la Cikgu! Haha!]..? Hahas I was flattered... Then went back, passed by Mdm Irma's table again, she, Mdm Fara and Mr Alsagoff were like saying that I was exactly like Siti Nurhaliza? Haha! Thanks...LoL! Then they say...Wahh receive flower sumore... Haha! And then I asked uh...So who gave me that flower?? I didn't know... Haha! Then Mr Alsagoff was like... Alamak...You didn't see the young man who gave you the flower?? I was like...Young? Haha! I thought teachers all old? LoL! Then he said it was Mr Tang! Aww... I saw him then I thanked him! Hehe! Then took group photo with my gang...

Went home to change, then went out around 2 pm to go Suntec with my friends...I saw Miss Zaleha with Mr Ryan Tan in his car! Hahas! Then I went to Marina Square with my friends... Had lots of fun joking at McDonald's while having our meal! Hehe! Then went to Candy Empire at Millenia Walk... LOVE the roof! Hehe! I bought a huge candy! Then we went to Suntec, went to Carrefour, I was emo for a while... Haha! Then I went to Harry's bookstore then me and Maizurah browse through some magazines... Hahas! Had fun there...Coz I saw this Archie comic...I said to her la... EH! ARCHIE BERBULU (hairy)!!... Archie sounds like Achi which means old Indian lady somehow... HAHAHA! Sounds so wrong! LOL! Annoying girls laughing loudly in a bookstore! Haha!... Well I guess that's all though! I gotta go now! I have nothing to blog about today's kenduri... Haha! Sowie! Bubbyes! =)

P.S. To my dearest Sam Chua, without you, I wouldn't even want to perform that day... And without you, I'll be unknown until...Forever. Hahas! And without you, I won't even be able to leave a strong memory in Mr Ang's life... Hehes! And without you, I wouldn't even be this happy right now! Hahas! And we will SHINE like superstars when we join the TCCC singing thingy aites? Let's make our school, friends and family proud of us! Hehe!

And I also realise... If he really don't bother about me at all anymore... Maybe I'll get over him somehow...Though I need to think of that way out... But dearest Mr I, if you do read my blog, I'll wait for you until we receive our certificates... Though the news about that sec 2 kid triggered my feelings for you... I just need a simple helo or smile from you for all the felings to come back... And I'm sorry if you think Ali is my boyfriend or my crush, coz he means nothing in my life compared to you... I'll miss you, my dearest crush... May you find a girl much better than I am... =) Amin. And I still love you...And will always do.

[I know most of you wanna know who is this Mr I... haha! Mister I...It's a mystery... Haha! Ok lame. Urm...I'll tell u after 'O' Levels ok? For those who are weak in the heart, please don't look forward for it! haha!]

HAPPY TEACHERS' DAY TO ALL TEACHERS IN SINGAPORE AND ESPECIALLY TO THE TEACHERS IN JUNYUAN SECONDARY!!!! Nooooo...!!! Today was the last day of school and I didn't get to enjoy the last moments with 4E3!! And MR ANG CAME TO MY CLASS AND I WASN'T THERE!! OH MY GOD!!!! >.<... Haiz... I miss my class already... And I got a lil' emo just now at Carrefour when I suddenly miss my class... =( Today, was the BEST DAY of my life! Hehe! It's because, I was able to conquer my fears and I achieved my sec 1 goal...Which was to impress the school, before I leave my school...! Hehe! And of coz to prove to EVERYONE that I am NOT a geek! Halooo~! Haha! I had fun you know? I was like nervous coz last year, I danced for Malay Dance and I was shivering like F***! Haha! So I was like...Errmmm...Am I going to forget my lyrics or too nervous to even sing??! Hahas! I guess not? I was so confident! Haha! Me? Confident? Wow! Haha! Let's get into more details...

Reached school, had ACES...Whateverness... Haha! So the NC16 sia the dance... Haha! And the boys were getting 'excited', seeing the girls on stage doing the so-called exercise! What the hell... I couldn't be bothered though... Haha! I was too 'excitenervous' for the concert! Haha! Excited coz I'm FINALLY performing for my beloved teachers[ESPECIALLY Mr Ang K S...^^] and my beloved 4E3...! I LOVE 4E3!! Hahas! Then went to class...Changed, put some make up on... Camwhored alot with my friends in the toilet! [I'm gonna miss you galz!!] Then go back to class, there was the ice-cream cakes!! YUMMY! Haha! I took the cookies and cream one... I was excited to eat but guess what...That one small slice, the last part I eat, I felt like vomitting everything out already... Haha! I tried my best to finish it though... Then we RUSHED TO THE HALL!!!

Reached the hall, went back stage and I guess it was 'stripping time' for the hakka boys...So I decided to get out of that place! Haha! Reached the hall only they started calling me Siti Nurhaliza...Aiyoyo... Haha! So paiseh leh... LoL! Then we rehearse la... I was VERY nervous that I kept on forgetting my lyrics!! Ahhh!! Haha! And always go off pitch for the chorus! Alamak ai... Haha! Which made me stress! And my throat suddenly became dry! OH! You know what?! Lucky I brought along 2 water bottles! One leaked until my school skirt in my bag was SOAKING WET! What the hell?! -.-...

Then when I was rehearsing, saw the teachers coming in the hall... I was like...MR ANG!!! Haha! Sam, Khai and Shi Hui was with me that time, and they were like shhh...! haha! Then I still continue, then Khai said...stop seyh kirin... Hahaha! Alaa...last year what... and OF COZ I must cheer for him! =P

Then we went back in la... Oh my gosh...The backstage people simply can't stop praising me can they? Haha! Terrence wished good luck to 'Mariah Carey' which happens to be me? haha! And I wished good luck to 'David Cook' which happens to be him! Hahas! Oh well, today is the final day, might as well make the best of it with my new friends... I'm gonna miss them soooo much! To all the performers, student councillers, PA crews, Mdm Fauziah, Miss Zaleha and MSB...

To Mdm Fauziah, Miss Zaleha and MSB, you guys are the greatest! Thanks for the time you've spent with us and giving us the moral support that we can do well in the concert! To Mdm Fauziah, thanks for the epok-epok and always supporting me whenever I sing! To Miss Zaleha, thank you for encouraging me throughout the rehearsals and for being so funny during the rehearsals [like when you told me to imagine you were Mr Ang! Haha! Cute la you! ^^]!! To MSB, it has been a while since I seen you... Coz I quit drama already! Hahas! I wanna thank you for the comments and tips you gave me and sam... And also for the chance to become a singer under you at TCCC... I am very honoured to be part of it all... Though I have to wait till November... Hahas! [Good news to my so-called fans...I'm gonna continue singing!!! Haha!]

To the PA crews... Thank you so much for not messing up the system today! Haha! And I really love the picture displayed on the big screen when we were singing! Thanks for that too! And thanks to some of the PA boys for your encouragements and supports! You guys helped me to build up my confidence level! You guys rock out loud la seyh! Hahas!

To the coucillers... Thanks for some of your supports... Some of you are just super sweet can?
Haha! And some are simply soo funny! Haha! And Amirah, you sang Little Wonders well...! Keep it up gal! As organisers of this concert, I wanna thank you peepz for organising such an outstanding event! And thanks to some for making the rehearsal fun! Hehes!

To the performers/presenters...Especially to Terrence, Natiara, Ahmad, Khai... I don't know how to thanks you peepz for your support throughout this entire week of rehearsals! And thank you so much for all the praises! You peepz did well too! And I am NOT lying! And Terrence, you may have made a mistake at one part of the song, you'll always be the best guy singer from Junyuan Sec based on what I have listened for these 4 years! You can do better next time! ^^!! And thank you soooo much for being so supportive and nice to me...! You're so funny and make every rehearsal an enjoyable one for me, with all your jokes! Hahas! YOU ROCK DUDE!!! To Natiara, thanks for your support and jokes too! Coz when I laugh, I don't really get that nervous, so thank you so much for helping me build up my confidence! To Ahmad, thanks for motivating me on Thursday, when I felt like I wanted to give up...You're right. If I think I suck, then I do suck. But when I think I can do well...I can actually do well! And thank you so much for making me laugh too and all those sweet stuffs you said to me! Hahas! Sorry I don't really reply those sweet stuffs so much...It's just that I'm not used to these kind of stuff... Haha! To Khai, thanks for your support for these rehearsal days and the concert just now! You're very supportive and funny too! Hahas! Thanks for your support and encouragement! For the rest of the performers and presenters, thanks for your good luck wishes and compliments coz you peepz truly build up my confidence level! And you guys are such great friends! With you guys around, rehearsal has never been boring and...WE SANG WELL FOR "LITTLE WONDERS"!!! Yay! Hahas!

Woah...I guess I'll continue tomorrow...It's 2.31 am already and I'm very tired already!! Hahas! The best part will come tomorrow... But for now, just watch the video la k? Comment at You Tube or my tag board, up to you ok? haha! I'l stop here for today! Nites!

Wheee~! Today was the LAST rehearsal... And I had a GREAT day! Hehe! Except for one part, which I don't wanna elaborate... Coz there was a happy ending to it... LoL! So yea... Hahas!

Today is like the 'official' last day of school...AND LAST PERIOD OF MATHS! OH MY GOD!! *Cries*... Haha! But I had fun joking with my friends and Mr Ang during maths today! Hehe! Mr Ang!! Youuuu light up my life...You give me hopeee...to carry onnn...! Hahaha! I'm gonna miss you my dearest teacher... *Cries*... Hahaha! I felt like crying ALOT of times today coz I can't bear to leave my sayangz-a-lot 4E3!! >.<... [And Mr Ang K K & Mr Ang K S! Haha!] And you know what? I passed my CHEMISTRY TEST! I got 78%! Cool right? Haha! Yayyyy!!! Haha! Oh my gosh!! 11.40 already!! I need to make the Teachers' Day cards!! Aiyoyo! >.<... Ok2...Let's make this quick! Haha!

Tomorrow will be THE BIG DAY for me! Hahas! So expect a super long post tomorrow! Wheee~! Hahas! Oh what the heck Kirin... LoL! I'm sooo excited for tomorrow! Hehe! Ok2... Let's talk about today's rehearsal... I had SO MUCH FUN as I said earlier... Except the early part... I wore full-dress coz Sam Chua told me to, then she don't wanna change...I was SUPER frustrated! -.-... Then I told her I was fed up uh..I was with Maizurah... Embarassing la sia! I was the only one wearing full dress! Chis! Then I stormed out of my school with Maizurah... Super pissed off... Actually I wanted to cry uh at the backstage coz I was too angry already... But then I rather get angry than cry! Haha! Then I rushed home to change to school uniform then I changed back... My mother and Maizurah were trying so hard to make me chill down... Hahas! When I returned to school, Diy told me Sam was crying... Then we apologised to each other at the backstage... Then we're okay already... Maizurah!! I wanna thank you a million times for accompanying me just now and for taking the video of us! Hehe! YOU ROCKS SIS! Hehe!

Actually the first time I sang it...IT SUCKED! And I got a lil' emo about that... So before the second rehearsal... I sat at backstage...Like emo about my voice? Haha! Then Ahmad came and motivate me... Hahas! I was like shocked since we're not even friends and I barely know him? Haha! He was like... Are you ok? Don't be sad...Your voice nice la... And I was like...Err..No? Haha! And I said my voice sucks... Then he said if you think your voice sucks then it sucks la... Don't think that way...And yada yada yadas... It really boost up my confidence level somehow... Hahas! Thanks dude! And this PA boy shook hands with me and wished me luck..And all my new friends at the backstage wished me luck...[But some of them said Good Luck Siti Nurhaliza...Haha!] I love the second trial... It was like WAY better... Hahas! Before I went out the boys at the side stage were uhhh...Supporting and making me laugh? Hahas! Then when I walked beside the red carpet... Terrence was like holding out his hands and sing along with me... I was like trying my best to control my laugh? Haha!

Then after we finished all that... We talked for a while...I talked to Sam Chua, Terrence and Sulaiman... Terrence asked me why I ignored him when he wanted to shake hands with me... I was like...Did you? Haha! I didn't even know he wanted to shake hands with me..! Haha! Then he asked Sulaiman and me, what if people want to shake hand with me tomorrow?...Then I was like..Rightt...Not gonna happen... LoL! And Sulaiman said I should like sing...Stop and spit at them! Haha! Ok they really cracked me up there! LoL! I have fun during EVERY rehearsal... I wanna wish all of the performers and presenters good luck for tomorrow! Do your best coz... WE CAN DO IT!! Hehe! We'll make this an unforgettable event aites? We rulez!! Hehe! And thank you so much to my newly made friends...Who have supported me through this whole thing... Who have made me laugh and help to build up my confidence... And to make me enjoy my last week of school.. I love you peepz! You peepz are THE BEST! Hehe! And I'm gonna miss ALL of you after tomorrow's performance! =)

I guess that's all! 12.15 am already!! Haha! Bubbyes! And HAPPY TEACHERS' DAY!!! ^^

Yo...! Gues what? I PASSED MY A-MATHS TEST! OH MY GOSH!!! The 'boo' part here is... I did all the corrections yesterday for NOTHING. -.-... Nevermind... Hahas! School was kinda okay today... Oh well, nothing much to blabber about school hours... Oh ya! Had class photo-taking session today! Yippee~! Hahas! My hair is different than usual... I hate my sec 1 picture...Grrr... Hahaha! Then we had this group photos...Small groups and I took a picture with my gang! Whee~! This year's photo-taking session is the coolest! Hahas! Then there's one shot where we all sqeezed together...And I almost fell coz Jia Hao pushed me since the other boys pushed him! So in OTHER WORDS... All the boys were pushing me! -.-... The formal picture, I stand beside Syafiqah...In the middle! Yay! Haha! In the middle is always for the tallest people in the row as you guys know... And I'm so proud about that! Haha! I'm tall like Fiqah! Haha!

I suddenly feel sad...Coz Friday is like the official last day of schol you know... I'll only come back to school for exams... Haiz... Wait! I plan to get 59 for my A-maths prelims...Maximum! Haha! So I will HAVE TO come back for maths remedial! Yay! Haha! [Maths freak...-.-...] Dream on la I get B3 for my A-maths... Oh well, who knows... My luck may just change if I study hard huh? Hahas! Well, that's what I will do starting from this Saturday... HOLIDAYS BABEH! Haha! Well I'll dedicate 90% of my time to my studies... MATHS! Haha! I'm gonna do my A-maths June paper this Saturday, after my beauty hour... Random: OH MY GOD I SUDDENLY MISS 4E3!!! I Don't Wanna Leave You Guys!!! I'll perform my best just for my darling 4E3! Hehe! You gus are THE best class EVER!! ^^... I Sayangggg 4E3 Banyak2! Hehe!

Today was full-dress rehearsal... Gosh I blushed lots of times too today... Haha! Simply because soooooo many people praised me based on my looks... Hehes... [Haiz...If only I'm as beautiful in his eyes as what they see me as...] Only Terrence called me Mariah Carey... Hahas! And he kept on calling me Mariah Carey but I kept quiet uh...Then he say to his friends..."See la...I call her she ignore me"...Hahas! Then he shook hands with me... Hahas! He made me feel like a superstar... Hahas! Somehow he is one of those people that motivates me to do my best this Friday and that I CAN sing and perform well for this Friday! Hehe! Thanks alot Terrence, Diyana, Samantha, Aiha, Syafiqah, Stephanie and many many more! Hehe! You guys are simply THE BEST! And don't even start on how many people called me Siti Nurhaliza... If they think I sing like her...They should dig their ears... Hahas! I have my OWN original voice ok? But thanks for the compliment! Haha! I'm more happy 'bout the 'you look like Siti' compliments! LoL! I went off pitch for one part of the song....Aiyayai... Ms Zaleha made me laugh... Hahas! She whispered to me...Imagine I'm Mr Ang... Hahas! What the...O.o... LoL! I had fun la just now... Loads of fun! Hahas! Except for the part where we had to sit at the backstage only...-.-... BORING~!... Hahas! I like the singing together part! FUN! Hehe!

Well I had fun in the day, but not in the night... Haiz... Eh you know what? Diyana said she always sees Ali! OH MY GOD! I'm gonna strangle her!! Haha! NOT FAIR!! I miss him seyh... Nevermind... I will ask my tuition friends whether he was there or not just now... I has a SWWEEEETTT dream of him yesterday! Hahas! We went home from tuition together and when I said I missed him, he said he missed me more!! ^^... Then right... He wanna walk me home, then I was like uncertain...So he asked uh..."Why? Scared someone from your school see you with me?"...I was like fine uh, walk home with me... Haha! Then I saw Mr I's side profile, walking towards my block with his friends...And I was shocked that I woke up from my sleep! Haha! Wooopz! Haha! Sheesh~! Come on... He has his model look-alike girl what... Ugh should have just continued the dream! Haha! It has been like FOREVER since I last saw him! Ahhh!! Hahas! I miss his super hot voice... Ahhh... LOL! Ok la... I have to go now... I need to do some revisions and then I need to rest... I can't sing well if I don't have enough rest... So yea... Hahas! Good night! Bubbyes! 11.18 p.m. already daaa... Haha! [By the way Syam, it wasn't your fault that I got all sensitive... And I really appreciate your effort for trying to cheer me up... You're a great friend...=) ]

REHEARSALS!!! Gosh I'm TIRED! It's almost 10 hours of schooling for today! Aiyoyo... Boleh mati leh...It means can die leh... Hahas! Work also like 8 hours only seyh... Oh well, this week is BUSY BUSY days, but next week is CHILL & STUDY days... OH! And FASTING days! Wheee~! I can lose weight!!! Hahas! Thought of seriously enjoying the days before fasting by eating lots of stuffs... Too bad I have no appetite this week... Thanks to this nervous feeling I have for Friday and EVERY rehearsal days! -.-... Stomach ache everyday! Ahhh!! Hahas!

Yesterday's rehearsal... Quite okay uh...Found out I have to walk down the aisle myself... And and and...I cannot stand close to Sam Chua anymore... Must stand very far from each other...o.o... I was like MORE scared than last week... Eeek! Hahas! Sylvest[I think...] from No Link, took a video of me and Sam singing... Only got one part when I sang, they sang along, and I thought I sounded terrible that part. Haha! I don't think it was Terrence's voice though... That guy's voice is...Fuh~! Can't put into words... Hahas! POWER! ^^ He loves my voice? I love his voice more! Hahas! Geography remedial was dead boring la seyh...-.-... And when I went home, I made flowers with my mom, using paper... FOR MY FAVOURITE TEACHER OF ALL TIMES...! Hehe! OH! And yesterday, I slept around 1.30 a.m. to STUDY CHEMISTRY... AND GUESS WHAT?!! The CHEM TEST WAS CANCELLED! Damn I was angry! -.-....And at night I got all emotional...Sheesh...-.-... AND OH YEAH!!! I told Mr Ang if this friday I do something, it's meant for him la... And he looked scared! Haha! He thought I was going to ask him sing! Hmm...Good suggestion, I shall pass the microphone to him! Hahah! And he seemed happy that I'm gonna sing for him...Awww... I'm gonna make you proud Mr Ang! Hehe!

Today was quite okay la... I have no mixed up emotions... I had 3 tests today... VERY FRUSTRATED with A-maths test! I KNOW ALL THE INTEGRATION QUESTIONS!!! BUT I MADE SO MANY CARELESS MISTAKES!! OH MY GOD!! I HATE MYSELF!!! -.-... Chem test... DIDN'T EVEN COME OUT ON THE PROCESS OF EXTRACTING IRON ORE!! OH MY GOD I HATE CHEM!!! -.-... Pass good enough la that piece of crap! -.-... During Chem Practical... Wah! The nitrogen dioxide had this pungent smell! I sniffed it in and I was like choking on it for a sec! Sheesh! I was super careless during the pratical too! What the hell... During English, we watched Dead Poet Society, a great show! The vocabs were...FUYOH~! Hahas! They were GENIUS! Hahas! But the ending was kinda sad coz this handsome guy killed himself...*sobx*! Hahas! And today was my last day of English period... MRS SHANKAR!!! I'M GONNA MISS YOU!!! And THURSDAY IS MY LAST MATHS PERIOD! Oh my GOD!! MR ANG!!! I'M GONNA MISS YOU EVEN MORE!!! Hahas! It won't be last period for sure, confirm I must come back for A-maths class... Hahaha! Oh well, since it's lesson with Mr Ang, I WON'T COMPLAIN! =)

School ended and we[me & Sam] straight away went for our rehearsal... Wah today quite a number of people didn't come! Hmm... I can't skip tomorrow's rehearsal to go to tuition though since there's photo-taking...[If you come to tuition tomorrow... DAMN YOU!!! When I come, you don't come, when I don't come, YOU COME! -.- Mr A...You better don't come tomorrow! Haha!] Tuition on thursday night... God...The noisy and annoying class...-.-... I wish upon a star that Mr A would be there! Hahaha! If he's there, I can't hear any voice coz all I wanna hear is HIS voice! Hehe! But he's like me la...We're very disciplined and quiet during class yea? Hahahahaha! Gosh I dreamt I chat with him that night... I was like.."Hey! Long time no see!"...he replied,"Oh busy uh..."...Me,"Me too! Hahas!"...The weird part was when he said,"Hahas! Cool... Looks like we're both busy huh? Why don't we study together then? So we'll be busy with each other then!"..All I replied was..."good idea...hehe"...In that dream, I was like BLUSHING! Hahahaha! Then I asked uh so that is why he rarely come to tuition nowadays...But he didn't reply... Awww... Shoots... I saw his display picture and was staring at it all the way... HAHA! He was wearing his specs and it was his messy curly hair that I saw during the holidays...But I only see half of his face... WHO CARES?! Still handsome! Haha! I guess I do miss him huh? When Mr I always giv me those hopes, I don't really think of Mr A much, but thinking of Mr I just cuts me deep...So I'll think of Mr A... I feel like I'm lying to myself...Coz I still love Mr I more than anyone in this world... Haiz... =(

Just now, the rehearsal was fun! Hehe! Simply because I kept on blushing? Hahas! I don't know how many people praised my voice eh... [Alhamdulillah... All the praises are meant for Allah...^^] Since 90% of them don't know me... They just call me Siti Nurhaliza...Which is NOT me, OBVIOUSLY... Hahas! But thanks anyway... Haha! As usual, Terrence kept on praising me... Haha! That boy ar... So sweet one! Hahas! And today he was funny! Hahas! Kept on rasing his thumbs up and giving me that supportive face whenever he sees me! Haha! The first time I sang today, a lot of screaming from my schoolmates... Hahas! I had to move around more than Sam had to... I have to walk to the teachers alone.. Ahh! Haha! Nevermind, it's for Mr Ang! Haha! MR ANG! I have a surprise for you on that day...! Nyehehe~! Don't worry la...I won't ask you to sing! Hahas! I can't tell you guys what it is... I'm afraid it won't be a surprise if Mr Ang reads my blog... Hahas! See for yourself this Friday ok? I NEED A CAMERAMAN!!! Hahas! CONFIRM will be SHOCKED! Hahahaha! Before anything, take not... I HAVE NO SPECIAL FEELINGS FOR MR ANG!! -.-... And MR A is not him!! MR A is a malay, MY AGE, MUSLIM and HANDSOME! Hahaha!

Then during the rehearsal just now... After I performed 2nd time, I chat with my new friends... Then Terrence was like...You sound like Mariah Carey... Then Sulaiman and this counciller girl shout at him...NO LA! Siti Nurhaliza!... Hahas! Then they were like influenced by SAMANTHA CHUA... She looks like Siti right?! "You know ar...If she wears make up ar... MORE LIKE SITI LEH!... Oh ya! Ya! People might even think she IS Siti..."...YEA RIGHT! I don't think Junyuan students are THAT blind... Haha! Then I helped Syl to pull out the stucked plug for his amplifier... They pulled and pulled but cannot come out, but I managed to do it...With patience and strength! Hahas! Cool~! And Syl was like so impressed? Hahas! No big deal la... LoL! I love my new friends, coz they always support me when I sing! Hehe! And Terrence wanted to exchange voice with me, since I FREAKIN' LOVE HIS VOICE, while he FREAKIN' LOVE MY VOICE... Hahas! So yea.. I said his voice was manly... He was being humble that's why he denied it! Haha! I think he's voice is the best among the guy performers! I'm not saying that coz he praises me... I love that voice since he performed for Junyuan Got Talent! It's just that I have no clue who the heck he is at that point of time... Hahas!

Tomorrow, need to bring PE shirt, Class tee, after school, rush home, use make-up, wear my full costume for the performance day coz I have 2 photo-taking! Wheeee~! I loike! haha! Bringing hair wax and some facial stuffs to school tomorrow... I wanna look rockin' in my class pict! Hahas! Ok la! It's 11.12 pm already! Need to pack up my bag!!! And then I sleepppppp!!! Bubbyes! Goodnight!

Ok I don't know which is worse... Having PMS and quarrel with my dad the whole day but we're off to Singapore Flyer, or, having cramps the whole day and stuck at home alone on a rainy day and keep on sneezing coz it's cold! I think...BOTH SUCKS! -.-...

Yesterday, I went to SF with my parents and Fiqry... Yea I know... Supposed to have group study... Last minute changes cannot ar? On Friday night, around 12.30... I don't know eh... I got fucked up SUPER easily and then I went to the toilet and cried my eye balls out... Haha! VERY sensitive... It didn't cross my mind that the 'time' has come AGAIN...-.-... Gosh... I seriously wouldn't wanna miss the first day of fasting! That would SUCK BIG TIME! And yesterday I have this fucking attitude that simply pisses everyone off! Hahas!

Actually I was wondering yesterday...Who's having PMS? Me or my DAD!? He was so 'MR-KNOW-IT-ALL'! I can't even question him which way we're going...! He was like,"Can you just keep quiet and follow ME! I KNOW where I'm going ar!"... FINE! -.-... After he said that I didn't even have the mood to smile! Sheesh! In the end, we ended up at Marina Bay MRT station... LOST. -.-... THEN he asked for directions... We went back to City Hall... Then he went straight to Raffles City... I was like...Shouldn't we go through CityLink Mall?... But I just said that in my mind... My mum asked my dad whether we were going in the right direction....Then I told my mum...Nevermind Mum...Just follow dad... he KNOWS where to go...-.-... Seriously I was being sarcastic. Then reached Raffles City, LOST AGAIN. I act as though it was none of my business...While he was like blur finding his way...I window-shopped. Haha! And I saw some super nice bags! Hahas! Then I couldn't take it anymore due to the blisters I had...-.-... Then called my bro... I LEAD THE WAY. My dad was like... Where are we going???... All I said was... Just follow me la... I know where to go...Haha! Like rephrasing whatever he told me before! I think he kinda forgot that I've once worked in the City before... -.-

We reached there kinda late... Sheesh... At least we arrived... It rained like the whole day? Sheesh... Then we entered the place...All the shops seems so EXPENSIVE... Bleargh... No mood to shop... Haha! Furthermore I was irritated by my father... Then at that place, saw Shikin and Juliana... What a coincidence! Hahas! Then when we were about to go to find a seat, saw my cousins and their parents... Nadhirah and Nashuha... Nashuha brought along 2 guy friends with her... Which at first I thought were waiters since they were serving her drinks... Hahas! Ooops! LoL! They were twins! And both were crazy over her! Haha! Gosh... If I were to bring along my boyfriend[which doesn't exists], I am VERY sure he wouldn't have a good time! Haha! And my parents would strongly oppose to the idea of bringing along my boyfriend with me! Haha! That's one thing that makes my parents proud of me... I'm single and Malay boys usually fear me... Hahaha! They are PROUD that I'm fierce to guys! LoL! Then I saw she was holding a rose! Chey! Haha! The two boys were dressed up like superstars seyh... Performing or something dudes? Haha! And when they walk away, they seemed like her bodyguards! Haha! Ok2 shut up la Kirin... xD

The food was nice... But not as nice as the drinks! Haha! Ok if I weren't in public, I would have drank up to 5 cups since I'm having that 'thing'... I have to drink LOTS of water! Haha! The cream puffs and eclair was YUMMILICIOUS! Shikin agrees with me on that! Hahas! Then we ride the SF... It was kinda fun... Slow and steady uh... Haha! The view was great at night! The city of lights! LoL! Maybe it was a lil' too slow yea... Hahaha! Then went to watch fireworks! Was it the fireworks festival or something? I don't know la... Just watch.... Haha! It was astounding! LoL! SUPER NICE! ^^ I got the videos...I'll upload it later... Oh gosh I have to cut this post short...I have the cramps again! >.<...

Then the place was jammed pack...Took the cab home... Damn I was tired... Had dinner at Prata Paradise... I ate Prata Paper... NOT my kinda food... Prata and sugar? Not spicy? -.-... But I LOVE the teh tarik! Hehe! Then walked home... At home, didn't do much then went to bed coz I was damn tired...

Today, did nothing much apart from playing game at my sister's laptop... Then I used my self-heating mask with cucumber eye patch... [My dark circles are actually reduced! Hahas!] Then I'm doing what I'm doing now... Since It's getting dark already, it means...STUDY TIME! -.-... Since I have Chem test tomorrow... What the fuckk...-.-... I hate the chapter on metals...And it's CHEM...Of COZ I hate it! Ok2...Gotta go already! Bubbyes!!! Enjoy the videos!








The Four Of Us!


Fiqry's got a girlfriend! Haha! "Mom...Can I go on a date with him? Pleeassseee!"


Me And Fiqry!


Me, Mom And Fiqry!

SCREW SOCIAL STUDIES!! Haha! Ok I know I'm gonna do SO badly for the paper just now... So what am I going to do about it? STUDY DAMN LOTS ON GEOGRAPHY AND GET A1 FOR GEOG! So I can pass my Humanities... Netx week, Chem and A-maths test... After blog, eat, chill...Around 10 pm or so, I'll start revising... Since there was no school in the morning... I'll 'school' at night... Hahas! I know... Lame...

The 1.5 hours during SS exam was like... 15 minutes! Sheesh...! -.-... Whatever... It's over anyways... So after the thing, had a 'meeting' with Diyana, Natasha and Jia Hao... We planned to walk to the library but I wanted to take my handphone first... Diy and Tasha tagged along to my house, when I found out my house was empty... So I decided to ask my friends to come to my house to study instead! We didn't study THAT much though... It was like a 'bluetooth session' coz we were like sending rock songs to each other... Hahas! We LOVE rock! Well the worst metal head among us is... Me... Haha! My songs were a BLAST! Hahas! Well that's my lullaby! Hehe! And I used to HATE rock so much? Haha! I still LOOK like I don't listen to rock if I'm in school... But outside school, with my spiky hair, people may think I'm a rock star... Haha!

We had fun la... You know what? I suddenly have a lot of friends seyh... Hahas! It makes me sad just thinking about how I should I live without their presence in my life... Hmmms... Oh well I'm gonna make the best of next week! Hahas! Oh the one month self-study shitty... Sure can meet up with these friends for group study what... Hehes! Although for some people, I know I will never see them again until 'O' Levels... Hahas! I not only love my classmates seyh... I love my schoolmates too! Well not all though... That includes classmates! Haha! Some of them are just assholes...-.-...

And then just now I let them hold my nephew, Fiqry... That little boy simply love my friends! Haha! ESPECIALLY Jia Hao... LoL! Diyana wanted to take him away from Jia Hao's hands but Fiqry just wouldn't let go! Hahas! And that Jia Hao was sooooo caring towards Fiqry! Haha! And I got a picture of them! Later I upload! Simply got nothing better to do... Haha! Then they insist that I sing for them... I sing abit only uh... And Tasha was like excited? Haha! And they all LOVED my voice! LoL! Thank you! Haha! With these supporters, I think I might have some courage to sing on stage! Hahas! I love this fame and glory... But I'm scared of the fans! Gosh... I mean I can sing in front of 4-5 of them... But not over 2000 of them! Ack! Haha! Nevermind... Just another challenge in my life! There's A Hero In Me!! Haha! And like WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?? Whenever I see a person in all white uniform... I think it's Mr A! Haha! I hope he'll be wearing green uniform next year! Coz if so, we'll be in the same JC! Hahas! [rightt....-.-] Ok ignore me... I'm crazy... LoL!

Wow... It's 8.58 already... Sheesh... 1 more hour to 'study time'...-.-... Tomorrow, I'm planning to go to Diy's house to study... I'll go after 3 pm... But I'm going home before 7 pm... So, let's say arounf 6.30 pm? Before 3 pm is like my Beauty Day... So yea... No disturbance! Haha! I'll ignore any text messages, calls or whatever... And my nose is free of this one bloody irritating white head! Haha! Coz I've sqeezed it out! Yeah! Haha! I think on Sinday I'll be going to the Singapore Flyer with my parents... Yay! Hehe! Coz there's gonna be fireworks! Talk about fireworks! My NDP fireworks video still haven't been uploaded yet! YouTube super slow la... -.-... I lazy wanna wait... Haha! Oh ya... Wait this is random uh... But to all the Malay girls out there... Don't you prefer Chinese guys to Malay guys? Haha! Just asking la... I mean...

Chinese guys...[I know all this coz this Chinese guy likes my sister, and he's SUPER DEDICATED TO HER! Oh my gosh... I'm SO jealous! Haha!]
-mostly sincere
-they respect that we're Muslims and we have to pray at times
-they know we can't eat non-halal food so they won't eat in front of us
-soooooo romantic
-when you bring them to go shopping, they'll wanna pay for everything!
-gentlemen, even if you're just friends! [I KNOW this! XD]...
HOWEVER...
-THEY ARE NOT MUSLIMS!!! >.<... Malay guys...[Ok this is based on experience and what I hear from others and what I see]
-good at sweet talk
-when they think they are sick of you, they'll just act like nothing happen and will just leave you HANGING! SHEESH~!
-good shopping cart, as in, you put in the $1...Which means that WE have to treat them, just bring them shopping and they'll carry ALL your stuffs for you, INCLUDING your handbags!
-See love in beauty rather than heart for most of them
-Maturity rate is slower than that of a Chinese guy
-They happen to be muslims but when they are out on a date, they won't even remind you about prayers! -.-
HOWEVER...
-They are Muslims and have no problem to get married to you

And have you peepz notice something? There are more Chinese and Malay couples nowadays... Makes me think seyh... Haha! Maybe I shouldn't go for Malay boys! LoL! Shopping carts... LOL! But some Chinese guys are WORSE than Malay boys... -.-... But I can't find any Malay boy which happens to be better than a Chinese boy though... Hahaha! Not yet maybe... BUT NOTHING beats the life of being Single! Wheee~! Hahaha! Why have ONE as a boyfriend...When you can have TEN as your bestfriends? Hahas! OH YA! You know what? I met Alif from Sleeq yesterday near TWCC McDonald's! Gosh his big eyes were CUTE! Haha! Reminds me of someone's big eyes! Hahas! Oh yea...I LOVE BIG EYES! And he was tall! He looks short in TV though... Haha! Whatever...Not interested. Haha! Ok uh he looked at me and all I can think was...He has Mr I's big eyes! Haha! And he was on TV just a moment ago? So? LoL! Talk about Mr I... I usually ACCIDENTALY look at him sometimes... I know la same goes to him... But some people think I did it on purpose! What am I? Desperate or something? -.-... No seyh... I didn't deliberately look at him seyh...-.-...

Ok la! I guess that's all! Gotta go now..! BUBBYES!!! And here's the picture!




Cute right Fiqry?? NOT Jia Hao... LOL! And MESSY TABLE! LoL!

Oh my gosh! Today is such a...DAY! Hahas! Oh I know I'm lame... OMG! Can you believe it? After Prelims exam, the graduating classes don't have to come to school anymore!! Yipeeeee~! Hahaha! But for maths, I must get at least 65% for E-maths and 60% for A-maths... Hopefully I can get that... *GuLp*! But obviously if I don't have to come I'll STILL COME! Haha! How can I bear not seeing Mr Ang for a week!?? Haha! I'm gonna MISSSSSSSS HIM! Haha! I know you guys are like... Ughh... WhatEVER Kirin...! Just shut up can? It's MY problem that he's my favourite teacher!! I mean... COME ON.... There must be at least one student that LOVES Mdm Teng...And certainly there ARE some people who dislikes her! [Count me in! -.-] So same goes to Mr Ang K S! Though I don't understand why would someone even hate him... =P

I hate Teachers' Day rehearsal just now... From 4.30-6.15 pm... Damn late right? And I happen to have SS Prelims tomorrow! Hello~! -.-... [F**k it la... My internet keeps on disconnecting! -.-...] I've wished 5 people good luck for tomorrow's paper just as I went online just now! Haha! Random uh... Hahas! No particular reason actually since all 5 are my classmates... And...Only one of them is my bestfriend? So yea... Classmates what... Haha! OH! You know what! Talk about classmates... Mr A [NOT Mr Ang! It's ALI!! -.-]... Didn't come yesterday! Oh my gosh!! You know what??! HE DIDN'T COME AGAIN!! ARGHHH! Hey Mister! Do you know that I NEED YOU as a motivation for me to pass my maths tests?! I miss him. Oh well there must be a reason why God separate us... HAHA! Since when we're even together? Haha! And I realise I still kinda like that Mr I... [Euh...Not my ex...-.-] But I think I'm kinda giving mean looks nowadays... Waddya expect? SMILE at him? YEA RIGHT! Since when did HE smile at me? And why should I even TRY...-.-...

I know just now was just a rehearsal... But it was damn scary la ok? Haha! MY LEGS were trembling when my hands didn't! THANKS! -.-... And I thought I embarrassed myself... But ALOT of people loved my voice! Haha! Thanks peepz! And this Chinese guy kept on praising my voice when HIS voice is as nice! o.o... NO KIDDING! Just wait and see during Teachers' Day! LOVE the voice dude! Haha! Oh. how come I can talk to this boy but not Malay boys? I can talk to any Chinese or Eurasian or Indian or whatever guy... EXCEPT Malay guys... Hahas! Not even interested to talk to them...! -.-... I told you before what... I'm a racist to my own race! Haha! I have rehearsals every single day next week... GOSH! Gonna be a tiring week! -.-... Wednesday is the photo-taking and rehearsal day... I tell you, I'm gonna look GREAT! Haha! Obviously I'll put on make-ups...DUH~! Hahas! Mdm Fauziah didn't allow me to give a gift especially to ONE teacher... [Damn!] Ok I won't do that... But before I leave, I will say..."Happy Teachers' Day!!! Mr Ang K S, YOU'RE THE BEST TEACHER!!!" Hahahaha! Kinda bias right? Haha! But I want to make it a memorable one for him! Gosh I'm gonna miss him after next year! *Sobx*! Haha! I start JC year 1 on 2nd January[Insya'Allah]... Maybe I won't say those shit you see... Coz I'm super scared since thousands of eye balls are STARING at me! AHHHH~! Hahaha! And I'm asking for trouble from Mdm Fauziah... Haha! I'll just tell Mr Ang on Thursday that the song is actually dedicated to him! Hahah! Sweet right?? LOL!

Next week, tuition on Thursday! I REALLY hope he's there! PLEASEEEE~!! Haha! Imagine, I come on Thrsday, but next week, he'll come on Wednesday! Gosh... We are SO not fated to meet! LoL! Ok la! I guess that's all! STUDY TIME!! [Yay no need to study Malay! Wohoo! Haha!] Good luck to EVERYONE that I haven't wish for tomorrow's exams! Have faith in yourselves and DON'T study TOO HARD! Haha! Heard that from Mr Khong... LoL! Bubbyes! TAKE CARE!!

Heluuu...! Hmmm I'm sure some of you are like wondering... What the hell is this song? Like no meaning like that... Hahas! But the music sure is nice right? Huhu! It's a song from Guitar Heroes 3... I played that game with my elder bro for almost 3 hours yesterday? Haha! My fingers hurt! But I had fun uh... LOTS of fun! I was the bassist all the way, he was the guitarist... Then we went out for a while... School was dull yesterday... No mood for schooling I guess... Hahas! Monday SUCKS...-.-... Coz there's Physics AND Chemistry! Like official science day...-.-...

OH MY GOSH!! Me and Sam Chua DID IT!! We Got In The Teachers' Day Concert!!! Hahas! I couldn't have done it without you Sammie! Hehe! But I'm not really THAT happy... I'm VERY VERY scared actually..! Ack! -.-... Just now was already scary! Less than 20 people were listening to me and I was like trembling! OH MY GOSH! OH MY GOSH! Hahas!

The judges were Mdm Fauziah and Miss Zaleha... [Wohhooo~! No Mr Jae! ^^] And I feel more comfortable with Miss Zaleha usually...Ironically, I was looking at Mdm Fauziah almost all the time... Haha! Maybe because she looked so engaged whenever I sang! Hahas! Same like the previous Junyuan Superstar audition I went to... She's my fan? Haha! I'm so proud about that! LoL! Ooh! Thanks for the drink Miss Zaleha! Hahas! My throat was like so dry that halfway, the walls of my oesophagus were like sticking together... I was like... SHOOT! LoL! Well I think they understand uh... I said I have a sore throat... Hahas! My lips were also very dry! Tsk... Luckily we made it... But we were told to walk down the aisle toward the teachers on the actual day... Oh my gosh... I'm so nervous! But for my Mr Angs... I'll do it! Wohooo~! Haha! Anything for you guys, Mr Ang K S and Mr Ang K K!

After the audition, I also gained some err... Fans? Haha! They loved our voices! Hehe thanks...! And thank you to those who called me Siti Nurhaliza... Hahas! And sorry I couldn't give you HER autograph since I'm Kirin and not Siti Nurhaliza... So we have different signatures yea... Hahas! I WISH I have her autograph! Huhu! And somehow... I achieved something... Haha! But I'm not telling you what! Haha! I told some of my SUPER close friends though! Huhu! I am evil seyh... LoL! But that aim really gave me the courage to try and sing! LoL! I DID IT!! Whoopee! Haha! I could hardly open my eyes this morning! Sheesh! Those drugs seriously puts me to deep sleep! Haha! After the whole shit, I was like super happy after all those praises... EHEM~! Haha! Then went to have breakfast with Sammie at McDonald's and we saw Amirah there... I made my father proud of me!! Haha! Though my mum don't give a shit about it... She doesn't even bother to TALK to me...-.-...

Ok like who am I kidding? I say all those bullshit about my crush and I think most of you know I don't mean a thing I said! Yi Ling, you really made me think seyh... Hahas! Thanks! LoL!

I guess the truth has to be revealed...To my close friends such as Diyana and Aiha... Sorry if I actually lied to you guys about this... I'm just too embarassed to tell the truth... Well here's the truth!

I think that every single rude stuffs he says in school are actually funny coz most of the time, I think of the same shit in my mind, just that I don't say them out loud... So in other words, I don't see the rudeness in him that I'm trying to see what my friends see in him all the time!

And if you guys think I insulted him too much in a freakin' post, think again. I have never insulted him since the day I found out I like him more than a year ago until the day I found out that it's useless for me to keep on hoping for him!

And when I say he doesn't have the looks, you can ask me how many people have said that I'm blind coz I keep on defending him and saying that he actually looks the best among the other guys! And people keep on saying I have bad taste, but I doubt that.

And when I say he's not clever, obviously I don't mean it. If you read my past posts, I keep on mentioning that I have faith in his studies and I will always pray that he'll succeed academically! And you can ask him yourself how many good luck wishes I gave him all this while! He must have lost count!

And the most obvious thing is... I still talk about him! I still blog about him! And I promised not to do that anymore after my heart was broken the other day! It's so obvious that my feelings are still there... Only that my hopes are gone and I'm trapped in fear instead. I don't want to lose him but I know I have to let him go very very soon... It's NOT just a crush... A simple dumb crush would be between me and Ali. I see him once and I suddenly smiled to myself, but after I go home, I don't give a shit about his existence! For this crush of mine, for your information, he's on my mind for like ALL THE TIME! -.-...

Now the truth has been revealed. Happy now to see how weak I am? Happy? Haiz... I'm just crestfallen right now... I don't dare to love anymore... I take it as though it is all over... But my heart is reluctant to let go of this strong feeling... Only God knows what I feel since last Friday until today... But the Prelims and 'O' Levels are coming and I won't allow this to affect my life emotionally... I don't want to be the emokid that I was 2 years back... I hate that person whom I used to be! All I do is cry and regret for everything that has passed by! I just can't get on with life! I know there are much more things out there in this world that can make me happy at this moment... For him, I'll just leave it to God to decide my fate... I'll always pray for him and if he's happy with his own choice, I'll be happy for him too... If we are fated, I'll thank God for it and will really treasure it... If we're not meant to be, I can accept the fate because I believe that every thing that happens in this world is for the best and is decided by God... And I can't oppose God's decision... I'll try my best to accept the fate. Happy now? Hahas! So you see, I don't hate him and I still feel devastated whenever I listen to "Teardrops On My Guitar"... Hahas! I used to hate him, but that was all in the past when I didn't know who he really was...

Urghhhh.... I feel like my head is spinning around right now! @.@... I have a bad cold and my Teachers' Day concert audition is tomorrow! Oh dear... Tonight, I'm gonna be 'knock out' since I'm gonna eat 3 tablets of sleeping pills for runny nose and two big spooful of cough syrup that causes drowsiness! Haha! Nahhh! I'm no drug addict excuse me! I MUST get well by tomorrow! I hope the Sweet Serenade can pass the audition tomorrow... Which is me and Sam... And I hope Nadzirah can also get through this audition! GO NADZIRAH!! Hahas!

Today there was English Prelims... Went quite smoothly... I hope I can get at least a B4... A C5 and below grade for English is SO embarassing! -.-... Well today was the first time my father actually asked me how was the paper! LoL? Haha! After Prelims, went to have lunch with Nadz and Diyana... 4E3... We Are SO naughty today! Hahaha! Better not elaborate on that since some teachers actually read my blog yea? Hahas!

Went home, there were more food... Damn it la... I got stomach ache the whole day! UNTIL NOW!! -.-... Don't even mention about sneezing! -.-... Right now I have a whole box of tissue beside me! Haha! Then after praying at around 5 pm, I went to airport until 10 pm... Gosh... Airport is BORING! OMG ANNIE!! I MISS YOU!!! I didn't see her at Polar! Sheesh... But I bought two White Cheesy Crap Puffs... I always wanted to try it at work...But always forget.. Haha! It's delicious! xD

Go home, did practically nothing at all! Haha! Oh well I'm gonna sleep soon, have to wake up at 7++ a.m. tomorrow to meet up with Sam... Wish us luck peepz! Bubbyes!! Good night and take care!

Yahoooo~! Another paper done! Oh my God! The anxiety of waiting for 9 people before me was too much to handle! Well I'm glad it's all over now... Sandcastle...Tch... Haha! I just hope I get at least a Merit... And yea... I think I know why Mr Tuition guy didn't come yesterday... Most probably English Oral... Well it's never too late to wish him luck! Haha! GOOD LUCK MR A! LoL! And Aiha... I am not infatuated with him seyh... LoL! Sometimes, some people exist in our life for us to forget another person! Haha! Same like my situation ok? LoL! I'm not using him la sey... Haha! How do I do that by not even talking to him? Haha!

Today I didn't have such a good day... TEST DAY... What the F... -.-... Chem test, manageable, only don't know how to do one question... Go and die uh... Hahah! And I have never seen a teacher laughing, when her student scold vulgarities in class...o.o... Mdm Teo scolded that boy, but she was there laughing? O.o... Are you ok? Hahah! Geography is a bye-bye situation la... GAME OVER. LoL! Maizurah didn't study too! Hi-5 sis! LoL! After MONTHS of not eating in school, the two of us actually ate our breakfast! Haha! I got my comment about my oral from Mrs Shankar after the thing... Coz I accidentally met her after the oral exam... I told her everything that I told my examiner... And she said my ideas were quite good uh... I heard alot of "Okay what...." from her... Haha! She said in this cute way! LoL! Love you Mrs Shankar! Thanks for the comment! Now I have confidence that I won't JUST pass the oral examination... Though I ruined one sentence of the passage... DAMN IT! LoL! But I made the teacher laugh... I also don't know what's so funny... LoL! But one of them is like so err... Scary uh... LoL! She had this "i'm gonna kill you" looks... Hahaha! I only look at her at certain times... Hahas!

I guess that's all! English prelims tomorrow... Hmms... All the best for everyone yea! DO YOUR BEST! Believe in yourself! Hahas! I must memorise my formats... Urmm... I have audition this Saturday.... Singing Hero as I mentioned... By Maraih Carey... But this sore throat makes me sound like Mariah Curry! -.-... I hope I get well soon! Damn... Hahas! Ok la... Bubbyes! Take care of yourselves these few days since exams are very near already! =)
[And don't you think I didn't caught you red-handed for looking at me! -.-]

Oh ya! Can you believe it?? My cousin, when we chat yesterday, I asked him, is he still friends with TI... Then he said not so la...And he asked why... I said nothing, just asking... And he said in malay... Why? You like him is it...??... What the...TI is the LAST person on earth I would love right now! After he broke my heart on PURPOSE... You think I actually LIKE him? Good enough I regard him as a human being for now... -.-...

Oh my God!! I am SO hating tomorrow! I have English Oral 'O' Levels Examinations! OMG OMG OMG!! I'm SO worried!! >.<...To make that worse...I HAVE 2 STUPID TESTS TOMORROW!!! Arghhh! I'm gonna FAIL my Geography Test!! I don't care! I'm very sorry Mr Khong... But I promise you I will pass my Prelims! Hahas! Chemistry test...I MUST PASS! I studied for it already and if I don't pass with 'flying colours'...I have to attend Mdm Chia's remedial lesson! O.O... OMG OMG! I MUST PASS!!! Haha! It sounded like an insult somehow.. Haha! At least it motivates me to pass! Hahas!

Just now, one of my friend told me, the news that broke my heart that one was just a joke... It's like contradicting whatever I heard from my another friend yesterday seyh... I also don't know who to believe... Well for what I believe, I believe that he doesn't like me, so why should I stay? Hahas! OMG! Can you believe it? I was like rushing to tuition coz I was 15 minutes late... But HE didn't come to tuition! What the...-.-... I know I come later la seyh! Haha! Jokingz la... LoL! He didn't come, I got highest in class for the test just now! Haha! Thanks for not coming Ali! LoL! [But kinda miss him leh... Haha!] I actually 'accidentaly' imagined him standing at the door there! Haha! Talk about la-la land... LoL! Got a feeling next week also he won't come...If next week he doesn't come... CONFIRM I will miss him! Haha! [Don't worry... He's not my new crush... He's simply too hot to be ignored ok? Haha! Talk about hottie of the year!] But today I was still alertduring tuition without his presence! Haha! I went home almst half an hour later than the rest since I have so many questions to ask Mr Tok! Hahas! And tomorrow, after English Oral, I might wanna meet Mr Ang K S for some tutoring! Hahas!

Suddenly Kirin so hardworking eh? LoL! Oh well...Anything for maths as they say! Haha! I sayang Maths!! LoL! Science? Whatever la... Haha! Today in school, Mdm Irni congratulate me and Maizurah and she asked for our files since she want to share it with those who needs them more... Eeyyerrr...My ugly hadwriting! Sure kena mock one! -.-... Well at least I got A1, so they better shut their bloody traps before I kick their arse! LoL! Then I asked Mdm Irni about Malay Lit... She said it's recommended for those who likes to read malay book...[Bleargh... LOL!] But she said for the fondation, I must have good language, and she said I've got that...Oh thank you...thank you... You're too kind... HAHA! Maizurah asked what about her language...But got ignored... Hahas sorry Maizurah...! LoL! But I just didn't like the part where Mdm Irni kept on emphasizing on those who just passed their Malay 'O' Levels... I mean come on... I could actually feel the humiliation that he felt seyh... Shouldn't announce this kind of things... How I wish I can help... LoL! I can but we're not close, so too bad la... Hahas! Mdm Irni better do her very best to make these people get their A's... Hahas! And WHY am I so concern? LoL!

I guess I'll stop here! I'm just on a short break after studying the whole day! Hahas! And thanks Sabri for the encouragements and tips for tomorrow! Hahas! I really appeciate it dude! Hope you get a beter grade the next time you take Malay 'O' Levels aites? Hahas! By the way... Don't get wrong ideas to some of the asses out there... He's my cousin for God's sakes! -.-... Ok la! Bubbyes!!

As Fred Flintstone always say...
Yabbadabbadooooooo~!

OH MY GOD!!! I GOT MY MALAY 'O' LEVELS RESULTS JUST NOW!!! OH MY GOSH! I got....
A1 for OVERALL and DISTINCTIONS for my ORAL!!! OMG!!!! ^^

Ok I am SUPER HAPPY right now! Haha! I'm not trying to show off or anything... I just want to share! Cannot? Got disturb you meh? Haha! Anyway, today, nobody could spoil my mood! I can smile the whole way and laugh at anything! Haha! All my friends passed the exam! Though some didn't do quite well... And to someone, congrats for passing, I knew you could do it. Gosh! And suddenly I feel so clever! HAHA! Sastera... HERE I COME! Haha! Sastera is Malay Lit by the way... I know it sounds boring to most of you...But NO WAY it's boring to me! I simply love malay and if I can't find any way to find the capital to open my shop, I might wanna be a temporary malay teacher... Spread the love for Malay Language to everyone! Hahahas!

To some of my close friends who didn't get what they expected...Cheer up aites? There's always the second trial! Do your best for that one and don't let this paper demoralise you! Always get up when you fall like they all say! I believe you girls can get A1/2 for the next trial! Just believe in yourselves ok? Especially Sam Chua, you are not useess, you're even much more cleverer than me! So DO YOUR BEST alright sis? =)



School was DEFINITELY fun today! Hahaha! Chem, we had practical... Quite fun uh... Surprisingly I paid attention... Haha! And I felt clever during the lesson too! Haha! What the...-.-.. Hahas! Oh ya! Before recess ended, I told Mr Ang K K my result, then he congratulate me and shook hand with me! Hahas! THANK YOU MR ANG!! Hahas! Ok back to where I was... SS wasn't that fun... English was fun! Haha! Mrs Shankar didn't come today... But we had to complete the comprehension from CHS... That Jia Hao ar... Something wrong with the brain... Hahas! He was humming 'rock-a-bye-baby' while doing his work... What the... Hahas! He sang the school song, physics electromagnetic spectrum song and lots more weird songs... Hahas! Then I asked him what's the meaning of "depression"...He gave me so many meanings and so many ACTIONS! Haha! And Diyana was thinking the wrong way...-.-... Had fun laughing with Jia Hao, Diyana and Maizurah during English... Hahas! Then the answer was flashed on the screen uh... Jia Hao was like so proud that most of the answers he gave me came out at the screen... Hello? I gave the answers...I just asked him whether it's right or not...EXCUSE ME! Haha! I laughed like hell lah during English... Furthermore, I was hyper...So like OBVIOUSLY I laughed a lot.. Haha!

After school, went to bubbletea shop with Diyana... Treat her since she always treat me! Make me feel guilty only... Hahas! Then got 2 of her friends... Like irritaing uh... I talked to Diyana, he answer those questions...What the hell... -.-... I was SO not talking to you dude! Oh ya! And in school, Diyana was like promoting this guy to me, she said we have so many things in common...And then she said he loves BFMV and Justin Timberlake like me.... And Jia Hao interrupts and said he likes Justin's hot bod! o.o... Is that guy straight? LOL! Ok back to that Fazley or Fazli guy... She said he looks hot ar... So? SO?? Haha! Imagine seyh if he becomes my boyfriend... My family member will call him Faz and my brother-in-law will also turn! Hahaha! What the... -.-... LoL! Anyway, NOT INTERESTED... Hahas! Oh well if she insist I get to know him...What the heck... I couldn't be bothered to have a boyfriend anyway! Simply crestfallen and I don't WISH to be in love anymore!

I've made so many people proud of me today! Nyeahahas! LoL! Oh ya! Congratulations to my friends who got A1/2 for Mother Tongue 'O' Levels! We Are The Champions My Friends...And We'll Keep On Fighting 'Till The End...! Hahaha! Ok shut up Kirin... LoL! Ok la...I guess I'll stop here! Gotta STUDY! Tomorrow tuition sure got test! I MUST BEAT ALI IN A TEST AT LEAST ONCE BEFORE I FINISH MY TUITION! Hahas! So my aim now is to practice my Remainder Factor Theorem...Not good at that... Sheesh... -.-... I'm gonna fail the A-maths test I took just now!! >.<... Ah forget it! OH MY GOD!!! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! MY SISTER JUST GAVE ME $50 FOR DOING WELL IN MY 'O' LEVELS!! OMG!!! THANK YOU ALONG!!! Hahas! FIFTY BUCKS! LOL! I need 5 weeks to save that amount of money! Haha! Ok la gotta go already...Bubbyes! =)

And I hope my nephew, Fiqry will get well soon! =)
After praying, I realise, I have gotten over him... I was unsure before this, but now it's confirmed... For those who knows about it...And worried that I might get hurt upon hearing the news, it's ok... I've already got hurt on Friday... Hahas! So I'm happy already now! Come on! I'm no desperado! There's lots more other guys in this world! Haha!

This song is so...Wonderful~! Hehe! It's amazing how I feel right now... Happy beyond compare... I feel as happy as when I used to like him! But this time, I'm feeling happy even when I don't see him... And I assume that I will be happier if I don't see his face! I've got rid of all the feelings I have for him... Lalala~! LoL!

I guess life can still be great like it used to be! Whee hee~! Haha! I know I promised not to blog today! Haha! I can't resist! Waddya expect?? Hahas! In 4 minutes time...I'll be leaving!!! To study again...I studied at my grandma's house today... More peaceful than my house... Had fun with my cousin, Nadhirah... My mood was disturbed on the way home...When my mum said they're g0nna rent a chalet but on thursday and friday... THANKS! And I'm like officially not invited since I'm schooling...Guess what she said? Too bad lor... -.-... THANK YOU...Sheesh! I have to stay at home alone for Thursday! Great uh! FINE UH! I don't need anybody uh! I can stay at home alone la seyh! -.-... PISSED OFF SIA! Friday and Saturday can but they choose Thursday and Friday...Ask everyone work or not on the two days but didn't even think that I'm SCHOOLING on those days! ARGH! -.-...

I studied in the bus... Haha! What the hell...Geek... LOL! And I saw my dream school...OMG I'M SO EXCITED TO JOIN TPJC!!! That rock climbing wall simply motivates me to go that school la dey! Haha! I guess I gotta go and start mugging again... What the hell...-.-.. Hahas! Well if TPJC is what I am for...I MUST study hard right? So...ADIOS AMIGOS! ^^

Eh! You know what? I realised something!!! You see ar... How can someone feel better from a broken heart just after one day?? That CAN happen...If you don't really love that person! Gosh... I don't really love him all this while ay? Haha! Well the feeling when I first found out about that news...Was much more painful than my break up with someone... But I took a year to get over it... Haha! I only took a day for this one... Well, I don't really fall 'back' in love with someone after I say it's over... I guess we're just not meant to be. And somehow, I'm happy about it coz I realise, I only like him because he's funny. Haha! The other characteristics he has...Ugh...Especially 'rude'...simply makes me think twice most of the time... You know what? Thinking all of these bullshits that my friends keep on reminding me about him all these while...Makes me feel better! Hehe! Oh well...The sun is setting already! I've gotta study! Hehe! Bubbyes! I'm not updating tomorrow, so BUBBYES! I WILL update on Tuesday though...MALAY 'O' LEVELS RESULT DAY!!!! Wheeee~! Hahas! Ok la! Bubbyes!

Here's the slideshow I promised! ENJOY!!!

I had fun shopping with my mother just now and she bought me a beautiful red blouse! And here's a picture of me and my friends at national day celebration just now...=)


Happy National Day Singapore...! =)

I wish the time can go faster than this...I wish school would end earlier... I wish I can never see your face again... I'm counting down the days until you can completely vanish from my life... I don't blame anyone to be the cause of my heartbreak...It's just me. So forget it...Nobody can help... Hmmms....

I thought I want to learn to hate you...But I guess, hating you is like hating myself...It's so impossible to happen...

Sorry I have not been updating for quite a while...And I don't think I want to blog so much nowadays... I blog because I feel like my life is so perfect... So fun that I just have to share it with everyone... But today, I realised, there's no such thing as a perfect life... And I've achieved something I always wanted... I didn't cry at all in July... =)

Just because of a simple event, I thought my life is perfect...I didn't know all of that would end in August... I didn't see it coming... I feel like...My life has no more meaning... I'm just living through it but I just can't seem to love it any longer... I just feel... Useless... Lonely... Depressed.

On Wednesday, I was listening to music... But I didn't know why, I cried. I was happy in the day...But I just had to cry that night... I just had a feeling after that, that something wrong is going to happen soon...But I just ignore it because I thought my life was complete... I got that thing that will always make me smile... To be specific...That person who never fails to make me smile, although, indirectly...

The next day, which was yesterday... The dark sky and the bad weather just explains it all... It tells a story of what I felt inside... I wasn't too happy in the day... And my friends in school just build up hopes in me for him... Until the sun sets and moon rises, I prayed hard to Allah... "When will all these end...? Will I ever get just a simple clue that he doesn't like me at all? Is this just a retribution for all that I've done in my life all this while...? Will I ever get a chance to even see him smiling at me?"...And after I prayed, it happened again... I cried again without any prior reasons... I guess that was one part of the clue... Yesterday, I cried for about 15 minutes straight... I guess I was just being paranoid... But sometimes, being paranoid is good, because sometimes, what we don't want to happen, really happens.

Today, National Day celebration was the worst one ever. Apart from that, my eyes were like heavy since I cried too much the day before... I didn't have a single clue that I would find out why I cried yesterday, today. I had some fun taking pictures with Nadzirah, Maizurah and Diyana. Thanks Sharon for the photos. My friends made my day fun in school. We were about to go around the neighbourhood to collect recyclable materials, when it happened. I heard about it... And I feel that sudden surge of despair in my heart. But I controlled my emotion and faked a smile. I even talked crap. Who am I kidding? I love Ali? I barely know him. The phrase "It's ok...You still have Ali" is never going to work again. I don't love him and I had never loved him. I only love one person and only him... For a second, I felt my heart, shattered, just as it was about to be fully healed... It's even shattered than before... I felt as though I was shot in the heart when I heard the news...

I wanted to cry, but I was too sad for the tears to even come out... I wanted to smile, but it looked to fake for everyone to see... I want to talk, but my voice sounded as though I was emotionless... I wanted to know what I was feeling, but the feeling of my heart crashing down says it all... I wanted to know the truth, but I knew...It was all over.

After the recycling programme, we sat outside our classroom... I chose to sit alone... I couldn't describe my feelings at all. I just need some time alone thinking positive... For once, I didn't sigh over something that really shattered my heart. And there it happened, I could not hold back my tears any longer... But didn't cry much, then I joined my friends... Tried to smile, but it was too difficult... I talked to my best friend after that. Thanks for the encouragements babe, I needed them... And thanks for telling me the news in the first place... What would I ever do without you? Then we went to the toilet when the fucking 4T1 fuckers sprayed water at us using water guns. Seriously, WRONG TIMING. I shouted vulgarities at them and I mean each and every word I said! I felt better after shouting so loudly though. I just needed to let out that anger in me... How can I be so stupid to fall in love again after I have told myself not to? In the hall, sang school song, I can't believe I sang it after such a long time...

Thought of following my friends to Interchange... But then I thought, I wanted to cry more than anything... I went home with a sulky mood... I could hardly smile. Changed my clothes, and off I go, crying. I cried for almost half an hour though today... And I cried again when I was typing the first paragraph of this post... Hahas! Well what is for sure, I'll just cry today and that's it... On Tuesday, there will be a different side of me coming to school...

Now, I don't feel like going to NDP tomorrow... My task is just to open an umbrella, get $10, and I can't even go to the floating stadium! Tell me what the fuck is that supposed to mean? -.-... I have to sit at a HUMID field, watching the whole parade on a huge screen television. Thank YOU!....-.-... But for now, I'll do anything to get my mind off him... Anything... And to some of my friends, don't bother going to my private blog anymore...I will never update it again.

Goodbye and have a great day ahead of you. Happy Birthday Junyuan and Singapore...

Ramalanku Tentang Penghujung Jalan Kisah Cintaku Ini Benar...